Michael Tullie stared down into the greenish choppy water beneath the bridge. Trying to empty his mind of the thing he was about to do. Why was he hesitating? He put out his cigarette and gripped the steel railing. It was now.

“Don’t do it. The impact will break your bones. Your body’s natural instincts will fight it. You’ll swallow water and ingest it into your lungs until they feel as though they will burst. You will lose consciousness and the carbon dioxide will poison your heart.” He folded his wings neatly around him and placed a hand next to Michael’s on the rail.

Jerked from his hypnotic stare into the water he looked to his right. “I am already dead?”

“No, my dear, you live.”

The voice seemed to rumble through his body and he was afraid. He’d thought himself beyond fear, beyond anything resembling feeling. “Who are you?”

“Daniel, my name is Daniel.”

Michael backed away. He was hallucinating. “Go away.”

“I cannot do that.”

“I’ve…I’ve lost it…totally insane.” He turned away from the thing and began to run across the bridge.

He ran, panicked and gasping for breath by the time he reached the road. Blindly he ran up the embankment stumbling and falling over loose rocks. Tearing vines and briars caught at his legs until he could run no more. He staggered toward a tree and fell over a root passing into oblivion.

Daniel, mindful of the tree limbs, lowered himself to the ground and slightly shook his head. He knelt down and gathered the man into his arms, cradling him as a child and closed his wings over him. He tried to decide what to do. He could take him back to his empty apartment where all his pain and suffering began. The ghosts of the recently departed still lingered in the bedroom, in the closets, in the bathroom medicine cabinet. Down the hall in the nursery that still smelled of baby powder, ghosts still hovered in the corners.

He looked down at the man’s damp curling hair and began rocking him against his breast. No, he would not return him to the hell of his making. He needed a fresh start; somewhere unfamiliar where the seed of a new life could take root and flourish. Somewhere he was needed and would be welcomed. He needed love and care to heal his heart, and his mind.

Michael was dreaming and began moving his legs and hands. He moved his head and then became still. Resting against warm flesh he moved his face toward the breast.

Daniel moved his wings way from the man’s face and looked down at him. It had been a long flight but not an unpleasant one. Nothing was ever unpleasant unless you made it so. He lifted his head and took a deep breath of the clean fresh air.  Around him a catch of yellow butterflies fluttered. He reached out and two landed on his hand. He lightly blew them away and smiled. It was peaceful here. He hoped Michael could adjust.

Unconsciously Daniel had hugged him a little closer. He loved him and had loved him all the man’s life. Perhaps it was time Michael became acquainted with him. He regretted the shock tactic he’d used at the bridge but it was necessary. Michael needed a shock.

He’d brought him to a meadow far away from the gray dirty city. Daniel didn’t know exactly where they were. He’d only sought a quiet peaceful place where the man could wake.

Michael was dreaming again. Dreaming of wings…birds. He could hear the wings, feel them against his face. He couldn’t breathe-

Michael made a sound in his throat and he came awake suddenly pulling away from the flesh he’d lain against and half falling out of Daniels arms. He sat on his butt with his eyes wide in terror.

“No…no.”

“Do not be afraid, Michael. You are safe with me and I will not harm you.”

“Wh…what are you…where did you come from?”

“I’m your angel. I don’t remember where I came from. I’ve always been with you.”

Michael was breathing heavily through his mouth. “No…not possible. I’ve slipped over the edge.” He looked wildly about. “Where am I?”

Daniel bit his lip, “I’m not really sure to be honest with you. I’ve never been here before but it’s nice, don’t you think?”

Michael couldn’t think at all. This was so beyond his comprehension. He stared at the so called ‘angel’. His soft hair curled about his face in a casual manner. His eyes were mesmerizing. He couldn’t look away. Unaccountably he began to relax and his breathing returned to normal.

“What do you want with me?”

“No more and no less than I did yesterday. I want peace for you. I want you to be happy again.”

“Huh,” Michael drew his legs beneath him.  “There isn’t anything left for me. You were on the bridge…it was you who stopped me.”

“Yes. It was I who caught you as you fell from your crib at one year of age. It was I who pulled your bike from the path of the fire engine. Shall I go on? I can you know.”

“I don’t believe this…I’m…it’s a nightmare…I just need to wake up.” He hid his face in his hands.

“You are awake. Don’t you hear the birds?  That was a cow did you hear it?”

Michael pulled his fingers down on his face and looked around again. He turned and got up on his knees.

“It’s a cow pasture.”

“Hmm, could be.”

“How did…you brought me here?”

“Um hmm. I wanted you to wake up in a peaceful place. Since I’d revealed myself to you I thought you needed an explanation as to who I was.”

“You haven’t given me much of an explanation.”

“I don’t think I have one, really. I just am.”

“You’re a freak.” Michael stood up.

Daniel stood up too and shook out his wings and brought them in tucking them neatly behind his back.

“You mean the wings. I don’t mind them at all. I don’t have to depend on wheels to get me around.”

Wheels brought to mind the car accident. Michael looked down at the grass and stepped on a dandelion smashing it. “I don’t care if I never see a car again.”

Daniel looked at him thoughtfully. “Are you sure about that?”

Michael looked into his eyes. “Do you know about the accident?”

Daniel frowned and took a step toward him. “Yes, I know. That’s why I’m here with you. I’m going to save you from yourself. Suicide is not the answer, Michael.”

“I don’t have another.”

“It will be revealed to you in time. Meanwhile, I will take care of you.”

Michael looked away across the rolling green hills. “You’d better take me back to where you found me.”

“If I do then you will die and I cannot allow that.  You were entrusted to me when you were born and they thought you would not live. I’ve been near you all your life. I will not desert you now. Come,” he held out his hand, “let us discover where we are.”

Michael backed away from Daniel’s hand. “I don’t think…um”

“You don’t want to touch me.”

“Well, you’re a man. Men don’t hold hands.”

“I’m an angel.”

“You don’t have man parts?”

Daniel looked down and lifted the soft blue tunic he wore.

Michael quickly looked away. He did have parts and was definitely male.

“You have no need to fear me, Michael. Come feel my wings and get past that fear you have of me. We will spend much time in each other’s company.”

Michael cautiously moved behind Daniel and marveled at his wings. He touched them lightly with the tips of his fingers. Powerful wings attached to a powerful back. Still it all seemed so unreal. Perhaps he had jumped and was dead after all. Or he was in a drug induced nightmare. Maybe he’d taken all the sleeping pills from the medicine cabinet. He remembered lining them up on the kitchen counter. But no, he hadn’t taken them.

Daniel was quite relaxed while Michael examined him.

“How old are you?”

“I am ageless. I do not know.”

“You don’t age?”

“I have always been this way.”

“Were you a man once?”

“I do not know but I suspect I was.”

Michael touched the hem of his gossamer garment. Fine soft material like silk. He looked up into Daniels eyes. They weren’t blue or green but both and mesmerizing. They bothered him. It was if Daniel could see right to his bone structure and knew him inside out. He blinked and looked away.

“Which way do we go?”

Daniel and Michael had been walking for awhile when they came upon a stream. Michael squatted down and washed his hands, still muddy from his frantic climb up the embankment. He splashed water on his face and wiped it with his sleeve. His jeans were still damp and muddy on the knees and his shoes were a mess. He stood up and wiped them as clean as he could on the grass.

Daniel watched him trying to clean himself. “Are you expecting to meet someone?”

“No, no that’s the last thing I want. I don’t like mud.”

Daniel smiled and lifted his head.  He turned his face toward the breeze that ruffled his feathers. “Someone comes.”

“Where?”

“From that direction. If you do not want to meet him then we should conceal ourselves.”

Michael looked up at the opposite bank and true there was a trail leading from the water’s edge.

“In the trees?”

“If you wish.”

Michael climbed up the hill with Daniel following him to a copse of trees. “He’ll see you with your wings.”

“He will not see me.” Daniel stood close behind him.

It was a man on horseback and he was singing. Michael watched him take his horse down to the stream and across up the bank. He was singing no known song he’d ever heard. His dress was strange too.  As he neared the trees he stopped and stood up in his stirrups and finished his song at the top of his voice. Satisfied he sat back down and hummed as he plodded along up the hill and out of sight.

“That was strange. Opera, it was, wasn’t it?”

“I believe so.”

“Where have you brought me, Daniel?”

“That is for you to discover for I do not know.”

Michael leaned against the tree trunk and looked at Daniel. “More and more I am beginning to think this is all a dream. Maybe a hallucination before I died. I am dead aren’t I?”

“If you were dead I would be weeping.”

“Why?”

“Because I love you.”

“Oh, I don’t think I want to hear that. I’m not that way, Daniel.”

Daniel smiled and touched his shoulder. "Neither am I. You think of love in a sexual way. I’m not sexual.”

“Really? You mean you don’t ever-?”

“No. If I hold you and touch you it is to give you comfort as a mother with a child.”

Michael looked him up and down, big strapping good looking guy-angel. He didn’t remind him of his mother at all. He looked back toward the trail the man had rode down.

“I guess we’d better continue on. We’ll follow the trail.” Michael led the way back to the trail and stepped in the shallow water crossing the stream. He walked along with his hands in his pockets and his mind wandered away from the green rolling hills back to the gritty city and back to Judith. The pain filled him as he again relived the argument that led to her taking their daughter and leaving him. The vehicle with the faulty brakes he’d been meaning to have fixed. The knock on the door. The policeman who brought him the news that is wife and daughter had died in an automobile accident.

From there he began to spiral downward into an abyss. He couldn’t work and quit his job and wandered aimlessly for a month. He wandered until he reached the bridge and decided to end the spiral. He was unaware tears were coursing down his cheeks until Daniel put his arm around his waist.

Michael stopped and turned to Daniel laying his head on his shoulder. Daniel covered him with his wings.

“Let me take your pain.” He said softly against Michael’s ear. “You have suffered enough. I cannot bear it any longer.”

Michael looked up into his eyes, “No, I need to be reminded. I need it to…”

Daniel took his face in his hands and locked his eyes with Michael’s. Michael watched as Daniel’s eyes filled with tears. “No,” he said, “no…Daniel.”

“It is done. You will remember but you will not hurt so much.”

The pain in his chest was gone. He wiped his eyes and hesitantly reached out and wiped Daniel’s cheek.

“Angels cry.”

“Sometimes. Are you ready to continue?”

Michael took a ragged breath. “Yes, I suppose so.” He moved away from Daniel, out of the circle of his wings. “Sorry…I”

“No need for you to be sorry. You were grieving for what was lost. I took your pain but it does not affect me as it did you for I did not love her.”

Michael felt embarrassed that he’d leaned on Daniel’s shoulder and wept. He squared his shoulders and began walking again. After a while he said, “I wish now I’d stepped forward and asked the man on horseback where this trail leads. It seems endless.”

“Are you tired? We can rest.”

“Yes, tired and weary. This past month has drained the life from me.”

Daniel found a spot in the shade of a tree. They sat upon a fallen log.

“How far do you think we’ve come?”

“Not very far but too far to go back.”

Michael looked at Daniel, “I think you’re right. It’s an odd place here. No people about.”

“You didn’t want to see anyone.”

“True.”

“You’ve changed your mind.”

“Maybe.”

“You have decided to live again.”

Michael looked over the hills. “I see smoke.”

“Hmm, might be a chimney. See how it goes straight up. It’s just over the next hillock. Shall we walk?”

“I’m tired.”

“Tomorrow, we can walk some more tomorrow. Why don’t you lie down and sleep.”

“Sleep? I haven’t slept in a month…well except when you brought me here.”

“That wasn’t really sleep. Lie down back there in the grass. I’ll watch over you while you sleep.”

Fatigue really hit him when he stood up and moved back to the soft looking grasses. He lay down and glanced at Daniel’s back. His wings were crossed behind him. He still couldn’t believe it. Things like this didn’t happen. He turned his head and looked up at the sky watching the clouds changing shape until his eyes began to droop. He fell into a deep and dreamless sleep.

As the sun began its descent behind the hills Daniel moved to Michael’s side. He lay down beside him and covered him with a wing.

He felt a disturbance in the air and Daniel rose up on an arm. He stood up with a leg on either side of Michael.

“Hello, Daniel.”

The dark angel swooped down and lightly landed across from Daniel.

“You’re too late.”

“How do I know he is sleeping?”

“You know he is. Go away he’s mine.”

“Not this night.”

“Arturo, you will not have him. He’s decided to live.”

“So you say but I have been watching him. He’s been thinking of taking his life for some time.”

“No longer.”

“Move aside.”

“No.”

Arturo’s wing flew across Daniel’s face and he tried to catch it.

“Ha, ha. You’ve grown old and weak.”

Daniel attacked him and they went to the earth rolling about clutching at each other’s throats. Arturo pulled himself away and rose up into the night sky. Daniel followed him upwards and they fought a vicious battle tearing at each other’s wings. With one last vicious attack Arturo flew away with one wing damaged but still it held him aloft.

Daniel circled over Michael and feeling his injuries he slowly fell to earth.

Michael woke at dawn feeling the dew upon him. He sat up and stretched and looked around for Daniel.

“Daniel, Daniel?” He walked around the tree and down onto the path.

“Michael.”

Michael ran a little ways down the path and found him.

“Daniel, what happened?”

“Arturo came for you, a dark angel who collects death. I wouldn’t let him have you.”

“Oh, Daniel, how badly are you injured?”

“I don’t know.”

“Let me help you up, can you stand?”

“I think so.”

Michael helped him to stand and then he could see the blood on Daniel's back. “He’s torn a wing loose.”

“An angel cannot fly with one wing.” Daniel leaned heavily on Michael.

“The chimney, there will be someone to help you. Can you walk…is it very painful?”

“It is painful but I will walk.”

His wing wanted to drag behind him and Michael tried to support it as they walked.

“Why didn’t you wake me?”

“It was not your battle, Michael, it was mine.”

“Well, you nearly killed yourself. Arturo will be coming for you.”

“I don’t think he will return for you. I will live because you live.”

“I think we decided that yesterday.”

Daniel smiled and hugged Michael’s supporting shoulder.

They hadn’t walked far before Daniel needed to rest. “Just for a little while, I’ll be all right.”

Michael was worried about him. “Can I bind your wing to your body? It might help.”

“If you wish.”

Michael took off his shirt and using the arms he tied them around Daniels chest tight enough to keep the wing from moving around.

“Thank you,” Daniel said.

Michael looked into his eyes. “You’ve looked after me all my life. You fought for me and nearly lost yours. I wish I could do more for you.”

“You have.” Daniel smiled and touched his face. This was the man who wanted to end his life not so long ago. He was beginning to care. “Let’s try it again. It shouldn’t be far now.”

As they came across the hillock the chimney became a small country cottage. A wooden picket fence surrounded the front garden and it was spilling over with pale pink roses.

“Maybe you’d better wait here. I mean…you’re an angel.”

Daniel sat down on a stone. “You go inside. I don’t mind waiting.”

Chickens squawked and ran out of his way as he walked to the front door and knocked.

The door was opened by a young woman. “Hello.”

“Hello, my name is Michael Tullie and, um, I have a friend who’s injured. I wonder if you might help us.”

The woman turned back into the room. “Mother, there’s some one here.”

Michael repeated his plea for help.

“Where is he?” the woman asked.

“He’s out by the gate.” The mother came out onto the porch. “Can he walk?”

“There’s, um, something you should know about him. He’s, uh, an angel.”

The woman stared at him a moment and looked back at her daughter. “Surely you jest.”

“No, it’s true enough. Come and see for yourself. He’s my guardian angel and his name is Daniel.” As an afterthought he said, “I have a little money with me, it’s not much but I’m willing to pay.”

“Let’s see this angel.” The woman walked with him back to the gate. She gasped when she saw Daniel.

“Good day to you, madam,” Daniel said.

“Why he’s beautiful. I’ve never seen an angel before. You’re injured?”

“Yes.”

“It’s his wing.” Michael unwrapped the shirt from Daniels chest.”

“Oh, dear, he might need some stitches. Let’s get you into the house.”

Daniel let them care for him. It was a new experience. He’d been injured before but never so seriously. This wasn’t the first time he’d fought for Michael’s life. He had a heart defect that he was unaware of as an adult. When he was an infant the doctors didn’t expect him to thrive. With love and care he’d grown to be a man.

The doctor who’d been summoned would accept no payment for his services. It was an honor for him to work on such a creature. The woman would not accept any money from Michael.

“Your money will not spend here.” She told him.

With Daniel cared for Michael began to relax and take in his surroundings. The cottage was warm and cozy and friendly. The woman prepared a good meal for them. He hadn’t realized he was hungry until the aroma from the dishes reached him. He also hadn’t really noticed the young woman who was busy helping her mother.

He noticed her now. Noticed her quick sure movements and her beauty. Over the meal he asked if there might be something he could do for them since they would not accept payment.

“We do not have a man here, Michael; there are many things around here that need doing. Jenny does what she can but she does not have the strength of a man.”

Jenny, her name was Jenny. Michael looked across the table at her and smiled. She shyly dropped her eyes and offered him the bread plate.

Daniel was getting stronger day by day. The doctor had been and removed the stitches. He tried out his wings but could not do more than hover for a short time. He knew he would heal quickly as angels, do but he was in no hurry. He enjoyed the attentions of the woman and her daughter.

One day he was sitting out in the garden sunning himself and Jenny came out of the house to scatter corn for the chickens. She saw him alone and came over to him.

“Where’s Michael?” she asked.

“Listen and you will hear.” The sound of a hammer striking nails came from the barn.

“He’s repairing the stable.” She sat down on the stone bench next to Daniel. “Have you known him very long?”

“All his life.”

“He seems sad sometimes.”

“He has suffered a great tragedy in his life. His wife and young daughter were killed in an accident.”

“Oh, how horrible.”

“He has suffered much and blamed himself for the accident but it was not his fault.”

“How does he come to be here?”

“I brought him here. He needs peace and happiness. He wanted to die but now he wants to live.”

“You love him don’t you?”

“Yes.”

“There was no one else in his life to love him?”

“No.”

“He’s very fortunate to have you.”

“I am the fortunate one.”

“He might need some help.” She looked at Daniel and set down her pan of corn.

Daniel watched her make her way to the barn. He lifted his face to the sun and smiled.

The woman looked out of her window and saw Daniel in the sun. “If that isn’t the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” She moved her duster around for a moment and then tossed it aside.

“Enjoying the sun?”

“Yes, it feels wonderful.”

She sat down next to him. “You’re healing pretty quickly.”

“It is the way of my kind. You have been very generous with us.”

“Not sure that’s so. Michael is earning his keep. He’s a fine young man.”

Daniel told her about Michael and how he came to be there in her barn hammering nails.

She wiped a few tears and lifted her face taking a deep breath. “He’s needed here. I need him to help around the farm. My husband didn’t come with me, you see. And then there’s Jenny. There’s really no one here for her.”

“We’ll give him time."

“Yes,” she said.

Day by day Daniel noticed Michael was looking better. He’d lost the pale haunted look he’d had on the bridge. The sun had touched his skin and the physical work gave him strength. They walked up the hillock one evening to watch the sunset.

“I saw you flying today. How does it feel?”

“I am healed.”

Michael looked toward the setting sun. “I guess we’ll be going then.”

“Do you want to continue the journey?”

“I don’t know what else is out there. I kind of like it here. There’s work to do and…Jenny.”

Daniel smiled and tucked a wing around Michael. “Jenny.”

“Well, I mean…she’s nice.”

“Yes, she is, and her mother is a good woman.” Daniel ran his fingers lightly down Michael’s arm. “Do you think you might be happy here? You wouldn’t get bored? It’s awfully quiet after the city life you had.”

“I think that’s what I like about it. There’s no pressure to do or be. And as for bored well, there’s a lot to do. Jenny said there’s a village not far from here.” Absently he fingered the feathers on Daniel’s wing.

“If you’re sure, if you’re very sure then this is the place for you.”

“For us.”

“For you, Michael. My time with you is nearly up. I’ve done all I can for you.”

“You aren’t going to leave me.” Michael pulled away from him and looked into his eyes.

“I have loved you, Michael, as no other has ever loved you. But there comes a time when I can no longer help you. You’ve chosen where you want to be and it’s a good place. You’re needed and will be loved here.”

Michael rested his head on his knees. He was beginning to understand now and it was all right except he didn’t want to lose Daniel. He’d gone from being afraid of him to…loving him and depending on him.

He lifted his head and wiped the tears from his eyes. “I wish you’d come to me a long time ago.”

“I was always there."

“Was it the bridge, did I jump?”

“No, my dear, it was your heart.”

Michael turned to him. “I’m sorry I was so…hung up about you. I didn’t understand. Daniel, I-“

Daniel reached for him and held him tightly against his breast. He kissed the top of his head. “I know you love me.” He folded his wings around them and slowly rocked him as the sun disappeared over the horizon.

That Michael could love again, without condition and with a pure heart was the last thing Daniel needed to see. It pained him to leave him but he knew Michael would be loved and cared for there. He leaned over the sleeping man and placed a light kiss on his cheek. With wet eyes he left the house at dawn. His wings now strong he rose above the house circled around once and disappeared into the clouds.

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