The Silence of Hindsight

The house was silent after Michael left and Richie walked back inside. He wandered from room to room downstairs, stopping in Toni’s study for awhile. The sudden burst of anger had left him drained and empty except for the knot in his gut. Truth, he hurt all over like he’d been beaten and lost the fight. He went back to the den, the pictures were still up on his computer and he sat down in front of them, the one of Travis with his hand at her shoulder, hand in her hair. He looked at it for a long time, until his face was wet and he shut it off.

In the kitchen he noticed he’d left the milk out and put it back in the fridge. He leaned his head against the cool surface of the fridge door and thought about what she’d asked him a few days ago, go away somewhere just the two of them, why hadn’t he done it. He hit the door with his fist.

He’d taken something away from her and given nothing to take its place. He hadn’t tried, he knew it. He’d never understood how important it was to her to have a baby. But she’d told him once if they didn’t that would be okay. He had instead led her to believe they might and then snatched that away. It was easy for him now to look back and see where things went wrong. Think of things he might have done if he’d been paying attention to her needs, if he’d been totally honest with her from the beginning.

Michael said give her some time, he would, he’d wait a few days let her have some time with her father and he’d call her then, maybe meet up with her somewhere in Coffs, if she’d see him at all.

What was it Michael said about Travis waiting in the wings? Richie ran his hand through his hair, he’d played right into his hands. The son-of-a-bitch.