The Honeymooners Act 1

Hurrying to the plane that would take them from Sydney to Perth Toni dropped her handbag, "Oh no the strap has broken, this is the only one I brought," she wailed to Richie who was trying to pick up the contents and stuff them back inside.

"We’ll buy you one first place that sells bags, now hurry Toni they ain’t gonna wait on us."

Buckled in they set back nearly breathless. Richie looked out the window, wishing he was getting off instead of taking off. Not that he didn’t want to spend time with Toni and celebrate their marriage, it was the hopping from one place to another. He’d gone along with everything she had suggested, figuring that was what she wanted him to do.

Toni was still feeling the champagne they’d drunk New Years Eve. It had been a glorious night on top of the hotel watching the New Year come in with fireworks over the harbor. She opened her bag trying to sort out the mess. A broken strap was not a good omen. She turned to Richie, "It will be fine love, it will you’ll see."

By the time they reached Perth Toni had a raging headache, unable to sleep on planes, she’d set with her head leaning against Richie who went to sleep the minute the plane was in the air. Now she had a stiff neck. They took a taxi to the hotel.

"Oh, we’re here already?’ Richie straightened in his seat. He looked over at Toni, "Are you okay? You look a little pale."

"Headache," she managed.

Richie took care of the taxi and took their bags inside; it was nice and cool in the lobby. Toni thought maybe she could take some aspirin and a nap and get rid of the head she carried. Their room while nice and clean was hot. Richie fiddled with the air until he gave up and called the front desk.

"They’re gonna move us Toni," he called through the bathroom door, "The air don’t work."

Toni mentally marked up another omen.

The next morning after a nice breakfast and a walkabout they checked out of the hotel and went back to the airport where a small plane would take them to the resort at the edge of the outback.

"It’s a little rustic," commented Richie after they were shown their own cabin.

"Well we knew it was going to be like this, be even more rustic for the next couple of nights you know. We’re camping."

"Yeah, " mumbled Richie looking over the brochures on the table next to a small TV.

Toni was a little apprehensive about the next two days, she’d never camped in her life. "You’ve camped haven’t you?" She asked taking his arm

"Yeah but the Marines took care of my desire to do it again." He hugged her, "Don’t worry babe."

Perhaps they should have worried the next morning when the guide assembled the group of people who would be going on the outback trek and brought around the horses they would be riding.

"Oh…he’s awfully big," Toni said moving up to the side of the horse.

Richie tightened the strap on her hat and smiled, "It’s a mare…not a he. Need some help?" He helped her mount.

Richie mounted his horse watching the guy in front of him, trying to put everything right. He pulled his hat down to his eyes…two days.

It wasn’t a bad ride. The horses were very gentle and once Toni and Richie got the hang of it they were fine. Toni took lots of pictures, Richie laughing at her from behind.

"Come on, you’re holding up the wagon train babe,  You can probably buy a postcard with the same picture on it."

"It’s not the same she said giving him a look over her shoulder."

The campsite was a little luxurious for the setting, but at least they enjoyed a nice meal and a somewhat comfortable night. Toni supple from yoga still felt a little soreness in her legs when she curled up next to Richie. The next morning she could hardly straighten out her legs.

"I can’t do this again today." She moaned zipping up her jeans, "Aren’t your legs sore?"

"Yes but I’m not thinking about it," he answered.

Toni thought about it and thought about a soak in a whirlpool.

They were out of the tree line by midday and into the hot sun. They both became more miserable as the day wore on. A shower and a nice meal did not make up for the foul mood they were both in by nightfall.

"I did not ask for a double cot. Maybe they thought we were on our honeymoon or something and wanted to be close," she said banging her pillow down again.

"Every time you move the bed goes wonky, just be still."

"I’m hot, it’s hot in here."

"It will cool down shortly Toni, in fact it will get cold before morning." Richie turned over facing her and tried to pull her up close to him.

"Don’t touch my bum, its sore."

"Well you’ll have to turn over then. There’s no room here for me not to touch you."

"I’m sorry Richie."

"For what babe?"

"For booking this, what a dumb idea."

He didn’t say a word.