One Step Forward and One Behind

Her doctor had just released her before leaving home to move here. It had been over 6 weeks since her emergency C-section that had led to the stillborn death of their baby girl. When she'd made it to her seventh month and everything had been going so well with her pregnancy, Marie had thought she and Bud would leave the hospital in 2 months with a healthy baby girl in their arms.

It had been so devastating for both of them. It had descended toward dangerous for Marie. Never in her life had she known such a deep sadness that she thought she couldn't bear or crawl out from beneath. Her doctor had told her the combination of grief and postpartum depression had overwhelmed her. Along with the isolation. She'd cut herself off from everyone she'd cared about including Bud. He was there every evening, but the two of them had been like strangers toward one another. Both mired in their intense grief and unable to help one another.

The counseling they'd gotten had allowed them to see outside of their own grief. They'd finally reached out to find comfort in the arms of the only two people who could understand what each were going through. Marie loved Bud with all her heart. There couldn't be two people who seemed more different on the surface. Yet together they complimented one another and became whole.

Three years ago Bud had been visiting a fellow cop in the hospital. He'd been shot while on duty, but thankfully would be okay. Marie had been his friend's nurse that evening. Bud had asked her out before he even left her unit. It seemed the two of them fell head over heels immediately. Marie had been casually dating a nice guy at the time. After her first date with Bud she never saw the other man again.

A year later they were married. And a year after that they'd lost their first child and uprooted themselves and moved half way around the world. Marie felt certain this move would be good for both of them. But Bud was giving up his thriving business to move here. She didn't know if he'd be able to start another in this much more rural setting versus the huge city of Los Angeles where they'd come from. It was a bit easier for Marie. She was a nurse and already had obtained her license to practice in Australia. She'd even be starting a job soon.

Things rarely happened easily in life. She and Bud would work hard to succeed. She knew he could. She'd never seen anyone as tenacious as he was. Which brought them to their current slight problem. Marie had become Bud's project. He was a very protective man to begin with, but since she'd told him she had been contemplating suicide, they'd become inseparable.

Marie could understand how he felt and she'd needed him at first. He was afraid to leave her alone. She knew he was terrified to lose her. And Bud didn't want to be alone himself. And he was driving her crazy. She was afraid if she turned around too fast at times she might fall over him.

He'd gone to meet the local reporter, Colleen O'Hara, to do a small introduction piece. It hadn't gone particularly well according what she'd gleaned from Bud and Colleen. Marie knew she should have gone with him. He hadn't wanted to leave her to begin with. He'd come home with Colleen in tow not too much later. The good part was she met a woman she liked an incredible amount. She hoped she'd met her first new friend here.

The bad part was Bud had continued hovering over her ever since that time. Marie sighed. They were going to have to get used to being separated again. Bud wouldn't be able to come to work with her once she started. And he needed to start feeling comfort in their separation. Now was the time.

"Bud, I'm going to the grocery store. Is there anything special you want? The kitchen is pretty much in order and it's time for me to cook us a good meal in there."

Bud had been putting a shelf up on the wall. He looked up at her. "Just give me a minute, Hon, and I'll go with you."

This was the moment where Marie considered slugging him on his considerable bicep. But, he was being so considerate and she didn't want to hurt his feelings.

"Bud, I know you're afraid to leave me alone. I understand. I'm going to be fine going to the store by myself. I'd rather do the grocery shopping by myself. And I know you don't like doing it anyway."

"I might believe that if you'd told me you wanted to go to the hardware store in town, Bud. The grocery store? No way. Remember, I know you."

"Yeah, the hardware store is a good idea." He placed the shelf in the last bracket. "See, I'm done. Go ahead and get ready and I'll drive you in. I'll stop by the hardware store after you go to the grocery store."

Marie put her hands on her hips and glared at him. Of all the stubborn pig headed men. He must be forgetting she could be pretty stubborn herself.

Bud had at least 50 pounds on her. She sure wasn't going to get into a shoving match with him. Instead she dealt with it as any mature adult female would. She picked up her keys and purse and ran out the door toward the car. She'd out run him and lock him out of the car and then drive away.

Marie was convinced she had victory just a hand's grasp away. She was that close to the car handle when the big man grabbed her around the waist from behind and picked her up off her feet to carry her back toward the house.

"You put me down right now, Wendell White." She linked her leg around his and tripped him; knocking both of them to the ground.

Bud 'oomphed' as the wind was slightly knocked out of him as he hit the ground. Marie yelled 'ouch' as the car keys, still firmly gripped in her hand, dug her in the side near her waist as she tumbled to the ground.

He breathlessly rolled over to check her out. When she saw the concern in his eyes, how could she be angry with him?

Bud leaned down and began to gently kiss the newly bared skin. The light touch of his lips actually made it feel better.

Bud moved his way up and began gently kissing her lips. Marie's arms slipped up around his neck and returned his kiss. The dimples showed in her cheeks as he broke from the kiss. Her fingers brushed across his cheek. His fingers continued to lightly brush the bruised skin at her waist.

"Okay, Bud. You can come into town with me if you let me do the grocery shopping while you go to the hardware store. Deal?" She stuck out her hand.

Bud leaned closer and whispered in her ear. "You have grass stains all over your shirt and behind." He cupped it possessively.