CINDERFELLA
A Fractured Fairy Tale of Maximus and His Stepbrothers
By Atonia Walpole
Graphics and background by Jo from LibrisCrowe
Once upon a time there lived an unhappy young man, unhappy for his father had remarried after the divorce and his new wife had three handsome sons on whom she lavished all her attention, loading them down with gifts.
Jack was given his own ship to play with in the sea where he delighted in making the crew walk the plank at least once a day,
John was given his own snow-making machine which he used to cover unsuspecting passersby with snow
and Jeffrey was given his own cigarette factory to destroy.
But, alas, poor Maximus was only given the woman’s hand-me-down dresses which he fashioned into a sort of shift.
He spent most of his time in the kitchen where he was made to clean the fireplace and polish the pots and pans. So dirty was he his step brothers called him Cinderfella for he was not allowed the fine soaps and towels allotted to his handsome brothers.
His only companion was the kitchen cat whom he called…Cat. “Cheer up, dirty fella, things could be worse you know?” meowed the cat.
“I don’t see how, but I shall continue on,” Cinderfella said sadly.
“You don’t see it, do ya? For all their fine clothes and thingamabobs, your stepbrothers have not the one thing that you have,” said the Cat cleaning a paw.
“But I have nothing,” Cinderfella said, dusting off his shoulder.
The Cat narrowed his eyes. “You, my handsome sir, have a flat-muscled stomach…and a beautiful face to go with it, I might add.”
Cinderfella smiled slightly. It was good to have a friend.
One day a truck came by laden with fine clothes for the three stepbrothers. Cinderfella watched from a crack in the kitchen door as his brothers pranced about in their new finery. There was to be a ball for the King’s daughter and soon they were rolling on the floor, fighting over who would win her hand.
“What about me?” Cinderfella asked when his ugly stepmother came through to harangue the cook.
“You? Hah! You aren’t going anywhere! There are pots to scrub and the chimney to clean.”
The night of the ball the ugly stepmother and her three handsome sons dressed in their finery and left the house to poor Cinderfella, who was washing up the last of the dishes. Suddenly a blinding light filled the kitchen. The cat cowered in the corner covering his eyes and Cinderfella found himself looking at the most handsome man.
“Who are you?” he asked.
“Ah, you would ask,” the man said, mincing around the kitchen, careful not to get anything on his splendid designer duds. “I, the most magnificent, am your Fair Sidfather,” he announced, displaying a slight smile.
“I don’t understand. Why are you here?”
“To rescue you, of course, get you out of this dismal kitchen place. Don’t you want to go to the ball?”
“Oh ,well, yes, to see the lovely princess. I hear she is the most beautiful in the land.”
“Then you shall, my dirty fella,” and with a wave of his manicured hand the dirty fella was transformed into a Roman General complete with a furry cape.
“Wow!” gasped Cinderfella. “Nice outfit, but how am I to get there?”
“Details, details…you, mangy cat, go and find me six white mice...and don’t eat them!” he ordered, pointing to the Cat.
“Have you a pumpkin?” he next asked the impressively attired General before him.
“Pumpkin…uh, no, no pumpkins here. I have a radish, I think.” Rummaging around in the vegetable bin he came up with a squash. “Will this do? It will only take a few minutes to cook it.”
“Cook it?” The Sidfather rolled his eyes. “Put it outside in the back yard and we’ll see what it becomes.”
Cinderfella laid the squash out in the driveway and stood back as the Fair Sidfather waved his manicured hand and a chariot appeared.
“Now where’s that cat?” he turned to see the cat dragging a single mouse and carefully placing it by Cinderfella’s booted feet.
‘Where are the rest of the mice?” asked the Fair Sidfather, raising a brow.
The cat cleared his throat and opened his mouth to speak. A mouse tail fell out. “I uh…”
The Fair Sidfather gave the cat an evil look and waved his hand turning him into a mouse.
“Now, my fine fellow, there is only one condition. You must be back by the stroke of twelve. Do not tarry or you will embarrass yourself and all the kingdom and most of all Me. I shall present you to the King,” he said, drawing himself up, “and hopefully the Princess will find you to her liking.”
With a wave of his hand they were off to the castle where he was indeed presented to the King and introduced to his daughter, the Princess Joimus. She was awestruck and danced all evening with the Roman General.
“You are beautiful beyond all others,” she said into his ear as they danced a slow tune. “What is your name?”
“It does not matter for you will not see me again. Let’s enjoy the evening, shall we?” he smiled.
Cinderfella did enjoy the evening and danced with the princess to the distress of his stepmother, who kept sending her sons to cut in, though they were always dismissed by the princess.
All too soon the clock began to strike. Cinderfella was about to kiss the Princess Joimus when he came to his senses as the last stroke of midnight struck. He turned to go but his clothes began to melt away. By the time he got to the door the only thing remaining was one boot and his ragged underwear. Gone were the chariot and the fine horses and only his friend, the well-fed Cat, remained on the drive.
“Well, look at you! You’d better hurry before you get locked up for decent exposure or whatever it’s called.”
Cinderfella and the Cat ran all the way back to the house. He let himself in the back door and pulling on his blue dress, began to sweep the hearth.
Soon his stepmother and her three handsome sons returned and raised voices could be heard beyond the kitchen door.
“Go to bed all of you! You’ve brought no glory to this house tonight despite your fine clothes and winning smiles.”
“But she did smile at me, Mum,” Jack protested as he was pushed up the stairs.
“She did glance my way,” said John as he was pushed up the stairs.
“She did look at me,” said Jeffrey as he was pulled up the stairs
The Stepmother was angry. Who was the handsome General who stole the heart of the Princess away from her sons? She would find out and banish him.”
The Princess Joimus ran down the steps as the beautiful General disappeared. She picked up his boot which had fallen as he made his getaway.
Turning to her ministers, she said, “You must find the man who fits this boot for I am in love with him and wish to marry him.”
The next day the ministers went door to door, trying the boot on some very unlikely gents, until they came to the house where Cinderfella and his family resided.
His three brothers tried to fit their feet in the boot, turning them sideways, backways, front ways and upside ways, but to no avail. The ministers were about to leave when Cinderfella came in to clean the hearth in the front parlor.
“You there, try on this boot!” the minister demanded.
Cinderfella backed away for he recognized the boot as the one he lost the night of the ball.
“Ah…no, I don’t think so.” He eyed the boot.
“We have been commanded to try this boot on every man in the kingdom. You WILL try it on!”
“Oh, but this is only Cinderfella. It won’t fit him,” said his stepmother with assurance. "He wasn’t even there.”
The ministers insisted and Cinderfella sat down on the sofa and stuck out his leg. The boot slid up his calf and settled perfectly on his foot. Suddenly the fine clothing reappeared and he was once again the Roman General. He stood, turning, and bowed slightly to his stepmother and three handsome brothers.
“I am indeed Maximus Decimus Meridius, Commander of the armies of the North and future husband of the Princess."
The Princess Joimus couldn’t wait any longer in the carriage and ran into the house. “It’s him!” she exclaimed. “Oh, my beautiful General and future husband, come away now in the carriage.”
“Yes, my dear, I shall, but first…” he turned to his stepmother and kissed her hand. “Thank you for your unkindness and hand me down dresses for without them I would not be your future King.” He smiled a small smile and joined his wife-to-be in the carriage.
No doubt they lived happily ever after….as the Fair Sidfather sat on his cloud with a small smile on his face and ticked off another name on the list.
THE END
